[A sannyas couple returning from the West said they had trouble with their families and had to marry in order to settle it.]
Osho: Mm! So nothing to be worried. Marriage is just a joke -- nothing to be worried about. Don't take it seriously, mm? Once you start taking marriage seriously, marriage is on the rocks. Take it as just a joke -- because nobody can be married. How can one be married? One can be in love -- that's natural -- but marriage? Nature knows no marriage. It is social and it is an institution, and it is good not to live in an institution. It is one of the ugliest institutions.
So, good that you have done it for the family so that they are happy, but don't you take it seriously otherwise you will become unhappy. Then your parents will be very happy if you become unhappy.
That's what they are trying to do. Love is not accepted because love is very dangerous. People are very worried if two persons are in love and not married; they are worried very much. It should not be a concern at all, but they are worried very much. They cannot believe and they cannot trust. They cannot allow that you should be happy and without any responsibility; that is the problem. Deep down the problem is that two persons are happy and without any responsibility. That cannot be allowed. So they have to get married and they have to become responsible and heavy and burdened -- then it's okay.
Then nobody bothers whether you are happy or not; nobody ever asks. Once you are married the society is at ease. They have forced you into a prison; now it is up to you to make what you make out of it.
Never take it seriously, because it gets into the mind. The mind is made by the same society, so it gets into the mind. One starts leaning on the other more. One starts taking the other more for granted. One starts behaving more and more like a wife and like a husband -- not as two human beings, not as two strangers.
When two strangers are there, it is beautiful... something transpires. When there is a husband and a wife, two mummies, two dead things are there. Nothing transpires between a husband and a wife except conflict. So beware! Keep your happiness, and keep your freedom. And it has been just to satisfy your parents, so good. But you should not take it in any way into your mind.
Osho
haha you are totally right. Marriage is an institution, for the couple supported by the in-laws, with high expectations, somewhat like getting a degree. But guess what couples who enter a marriage should be ready for the task of 'studying', 'passing examinations' if not this institution is not for them. I could see this in my life, I had wanted to 'study' and he wanted to 'play' hmm so there goes the partnership, the end of a relationship. Could I interpret it in this manner?
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely Gia... you surely can, cause here you are not venting hypocritical philosophies.. I know they are our of your experiences.. And who would know the taste of the water better? The student who knows that the formula of water is H2O and never drank it or the one who has simply drank it.
ReplyDelete:)