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11 DECEMBER 1931 AND 19 JANUARY 1990

I would like more and more writers, poets, film makers to steal as much as they can, because truth is not my property, I am not its owner. let it reach in any way, in anybody's name, in any form, but let it reach. Beyond Psychology#3 Q#2 : Osho

If you really want to know who I am, you have to be as absolutely empty as I am. Then two mirrors will be facing each other, and only emptiness will be mirrored: two mirrors facing each other. But if you have some idea, then you will see your own idea in me."

"Only that which cannot be taken away by death is real. Everything else is unreal, it is made of the same stuff dreams are made of." ~OSHO♥

Sunday, 29 November 2009

Love : Whenever You Find a Difficulty, Make It a Challenge - Osho

It is a very common phenomenon: whenever you want to go into a relationship a part of your mind always wants to avoid it. And there are reasons . . . .

First: because you are lonely you want to go into relationship -- so you have a desire and a need to go into relationship. But each relationship brings problems, difficulties, challenges, miseries, conflicts, so another part of the mind says 'Why get into this trouble?' And both are right!

Alone you feel lonely, alone you feel sad, alone you feel 'What is the meaning of life?' -- because the poetry arises only when you are together with somebody. A life takes on meaning only when you are in love, otherwise it seems meaningless -- why go on living, for what? for whom?
So one part of the mind thinks, 'Love somebody, be loved by somebody, share your energy, celebrate.' Another part of the mind says 'Beware, because each relationship turns out to be a problem.' Alone there are no problems -- only you are the problem, there is no other problem -- but with the second person, the other person, come many problems and then both together you multiply problems.

So one part of the mind goes on saying 'Beware, don't get into this trouble. Alone, at least you are peaceful: not happy -- right -- but at least peaceful. In relationship, who knows if happiness will happen or not? -- but one thing is certain: peace will be destroyed!'

That's why the conflict. It is in every human being! Each likes to love and each likes to avoid.

Now, one has to understand it. One thing is that right now if you avoid relationship you will not grow, you will remain stuck, because those challenges that relationship brings are a must. They are growth opportunities -- don't take them just as problems; they are tasks to be done. One has to do that homework, otherwise one never grows. Just think of a man who has never been in any trouble -- he will never become mature -- who has never been in anxiety, anguish, turmoil; he will never mature, he will remain childish, he will not have any backbone. And any small thing will destroy him. He will not have any stamina to stand up against anything.

So these troubles, conflicts, anger, hatred, jealousy, possessiveness, domination, and a thousand and one things come with the relationship. They are all great opportunities to be used to go beyond them. It is good! Yes, one day will arrive when you will not need anyone, anybody, but then there is no problem. Then you are so happy alone that there is no problem, there is no question of being related. But right now it will be very very harmful for you to avoid relationships. Plunge into them, and while young go through all sorts of problematic situations so by the time you start becoming physically mature you also attain psychological maturity. Otherwise what happens? -- people become physically mature and psychologically they remain childish. You can find them everywhere: their face looks as if they are fifty -- if you just scratch the surface you will find a twelve-year-old child; inside they are just stupid children.

So this is for you to decide . . . but growth comes through difficulties. I am always for difficulties -- never avoid them! Whenever you find a difficulty, make it a challenge. Forget everything and jump into the difficulty. And to love a difficult person is one of the most beautiful experiences. Never find a person who has no difficulties! He will not be of any help; nothing will come out of him. Find a really difficult person, mm? And there is no need to go anywhere -- be here, meditate.



  1. I am reading this and agreeing totally. My boy asks why he has so many problems. Like what you just said... for his growth for my growth. He is no stupid boy, in fact I find that he has matured beyond his years. I am very proud of him. Bless you dear.

  2. Hmm.. that is so nice to hear Gaia.

    Yeah I doubt there is any growth without any hardship... When have we learnt lessons of life in moments of happiness....

    Like Osho says, there is depth in pain.. if you are ready to accept the challence and face the pain.. the outcome is much much worthier than the pain that we felt initially...

    My love to you and your son....

    Take care...

    Have a nice day...

  3. I'm in a loveless relationship and it has been that way for sometime. We are divorcing but probably will remain living together because of our children.

    Today I as saying to a friend, I want to love someone! Really love someone. My sons don't wish their dad and I to be apart but I have been so miserable for quite a long time and want to move on. When the divorce is final, I want to move on...finances seem to keep up together.

    My soon-to-be ex continues to follow me around the house and just doesn't have a mind of his own. We do not stay in the same room and even though I tell him we are not a couple, he keeps trying which gets me more frustrated because I do not see us as a couple and, again, haven't for a long time...hence the divorce.

    So I really wonder if love is there for me to find. Most of the time I'm content to be alone. Yet today I can't help thinking that I so want to have a beautiful relationship that can blossom with all the issues mentioned but believe moving on and loving is the ultimate! I'm tired of being in the present 'pain'. New pain would be welcomed! :)

  4. Hi Carrie,

    Firstly, I appreicate your courage to share your life here. Else most of the time Ive seen people deceiving themselves by becoming ignorant of the facts and in consequence they continue to suffer.

    I will tell you straight... As I've understood things there is no point staying together once you are divorced. In a way you are divorced already, staying in separate rooms... no love.... The divorce in the court will only be a social formality. And as you've said that you've been miserable for so long and "I'm tired of being in the present 'pain'."

    Do you think even if you continue to stay together "your pains" will forsake you for the sake of your children? It is as simple as this..... To make others happy you have to become happy first... To help others you have to help yourself first.. If you are sure that you will remain happy even after the legal-divorce, then, I fully support you to maint the relationship and live together. But if you continue to suffer even after the divorce, all those agony and pain... how are you going to give happiness to your kids then, which is the only reason you have mentioned to stay together even after the divorce.

    To give|share happiness, you ought to become happy first, right Carrie?

    Of course love is always there for you to find. You can trust me on that. Love is not anybody's prerogative. There is abundant love everywhere... It's just that you have to initiate the steps to discover it.. and if you begin your search... you will find it.. and if you don't you probably never will...

    And one day when you find your love, make sure, the same mistakes of the past affair aren't repeated. Esle it will mean the lesson hasn't been learnt. Continue to commit mistakes... but only new ones... cause with each new mistakes you will continue to learn.. And life's all about that right.. Learning and growing...

    Also, try and make the separation with your current man, as smooth as possible.. talk to him and make him understand things... Thank him for all those lovely moments he has given to you, which I am sure he has...

    Remember, if you stay with the man you don't love, you are committing two mistakes:

    1. You are stopping yourself from finding the love you so much deserve.

    2. You are also stopping your man from finding the woman who would have really loved and cared him, whihc he so much deserves.

    God bless.


    If you can I would recommend you read these articles also:




    N.B: Incase the links don't work when you click on them please copy and paste them in your browser.


  5. Love is a mystery. It's a part of party, pain and puzzle. Go with the flow.. Milton.